being practically 31 and still single, you can imagine that i have had my share of dating experiences. regardless of the age, the guy, where you are in life, etc., i think one major constant in the process is that you are going to go to your friends for advice, support and encouragement.

i'm sure most of the contributers to this blog (and likely the readers too) have had some crazy experiences while out in the dating world, and it's likely that you immediately go to your friends to tell them about it, vent about things, ask for advice, look for comfort, etc. i think it's great. even if i don't always take the advice of my friends (and they don't always take mine), what would i do without it? i love having people in my life that i can share all of these crazy happenings with. i think that's one big reason we even have friends in our lives...to share life with!

people who live in or have ever lived in the dating universe are going to have a lot of common experiences. but the great thing is that we also have different experiences and can therefore try to learn from each other.

anyway, my point in all this is that i have gotten some great advice from my friends over the years. some of it i have taken and some i haven't, but i either way, i have loved getting it. but i must say, my favorite bit of advice i've gotten from a friend this year was this:

i know he's probably harmless and he's a good friend of several of your/our friends, but i get a VERY weird, almost dangerous vibe from him. and not in, like, a sexy way. do you? i don't know... it seems like you could be exchanging harmless texts with him one day... and then next day, he's standing outside your front door naked and bloodied, holding a sign that says "NONE SHALL COME BEFORE THEE." And that sign is on fire.

duckberg

first dates are the toughest, generally speaking. and the toughest thing about first dates is having things to talk about.

i heard that making a list of questions to ask your date is a good idea. just write down a series of questions on a piece of paper or notecard. it's preferable if you pull out the actual list of questions while on the date. this lets your date know that you're taking this date seriously (which is different than wanting to seriously date).

the only real question is what questions do you include on the list?

for instance, i realized the population bottleneck crisis is threatening the survival of most of the world. and i'm not just talking about humans, but significant amounts of animal, plant and microbial life too. so i have strong feelings against having biological children. i'm totally for adoption (even though some people i know try to say that adoption isn't realistic in any situation ever), but would be against fathering biological children in most circumstances. so, should i include in my first date questionnaire a question about feelings regarding the ethical problems in having biological children?

also, i would suggest that each first date should have it's own list of questions.