Monday, March 24, 2008

bff to sister wife to bff

This weekend natali and I had a rollercoaster romance. We met and fell in love with our husband and shortly after all became disappointed with each other and fell out of love and broke up. It was a whirlwind to say the least.

Natali had a gift certificate to Ruby River from work. $50. Since we had spent much of the day together decorating cookies and making easter baskets, we thought we might as well make it a marathon date and go to dinner as well. Natali’s (work’s) treat. Sounds good to me. Little did we know we were about to fall in love….

You wouldn’t have thought it at first. Our waiter (mark) was cute enough. I don’t know about natali, but it wasn’t love at first sight for me. However, when mark opened his mouth and emitted an Aussie accent, we were both smitten. The feelings were mutual. It was my first polygamous relationship and I was in heaven. I started calling natali “sister wife”. It felt natural. She did the gay thing and dropped the “sister” when addressing me. Also natural.

We were debating on an appetizer. Because who doesn’t get them when a gift card is involved? We asked our new Aussie boyfriend Mark what his favorite appetizer was. He said it was the smoked trout and began describing it’s every goodness. Sourdough bread, cream cheese, capers, red onions…MTB!! That’s exactly what we were thinking about getting! that’s exactly what we were thinking about getting! we told mark. We were ready to take this relationship to the next level.

Shortly thereafter he brought it out to us and we dove right in. yum! BFAM (BF Aussie Mark) was right, this IS good! Did that last bite taste kind of like mold? Nahhh. Nat and I ate two full pieces of smoked trout on sourdough bread before we noticed the mold. There was kind of a lot. Actually, nat at 2.5 pieces. Two before we found the mold and .5 after. What can she say, it was good trout.

Um…excuse me, Aussie Mark? Um…there’s mold on this bread…Aussie Mark was shocked and embarrassed. He began to withdraw. He sent other people to deliver our food and when he came to bring us new waters he couldn’t even look us in the eye. But BFAM, we aren’t mad! Sure, we want to puke and we can’t stop laughing (and weezing if you’re natali), but we’re not mad! Please, give us another chance. But he couldn’t. He felt too much shame in recommending something so emphatically and making us eat mold. I guess I can’t blame him. I mean, he made us eat mold!

What a love affair.


natali said...

laughing makes me wheeze. everyone loves a wheezy kid. or adult.

and to clarify i removed all the mold before finishing that .5 piece.

i miss mark.

Colls said...

maybe you were wheezing because of the mold...the closing of your esophagus..etc. couldn't you have faked a pass-out so mark had to give you cpr?

natali said...

who are we kidding i was always more interested in becky.

michelle said...

HA HA HA HA HA HA this was the funniest thing ever, no EVER, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha BFAM, oh bless his heart