25 and-a-half years ago (happy half-birthday to me yesterday), i laid in the hospital nursery batting my little eyes and crying an inherent flirty cry to the little boy babies around me. (this is actually a lie – i was in an incubator with jaundice for two weeks..) the point is, we’re all born with the natural ability to flirt. some of us lose it between about first and second grade when pinning your love interest and spitting in his/her face all of a sudden seemed like the best way to show your affection. others lose it later in life when they never grow out of spitting on their dates. anyway, i’d like to think i’ve kept a fair amount of my flirting ability over the course of my life. i can’t tromp the best of them, but i recently grew out of my spitting phase, so i guess i’m about average. i can hold my own – we’ll say that.
and then, enter the internet (boo! hiss!) i’m yet to get into the whole internet dating thing – not for any particular reason – i’m not anti or anything, i just haven’t delved into it. but i do know this – online flirting is definitely not included in the inherent-flirting package. we weren’t born knowing how to online flirt. and that’s recently become painfully obvious.
see this random boy (if you want to know his name, ask me. there’s a good chance you might know him – crazy small mormon utah internet-savvy world. then you can just hook us up in person) wrote me on the ldslinkup saying something brilliant like “hey what’s up.” i’ve gotten messages like this before, but this time, the boy seemed not only fairly normal, but also fairly attractive and fairly my type. so i wrote back something equally as brilliant like “hi you’re hot.” we exchanged a few emails in a very short period of time (like hours) and then he gave me his beloved email address, so i immediately (per the norm) emailed him…and then nothing…so, i wrote back to him on the linkup just making sure he got my email because how silly if we stopped talking due to msn thinking i was spam-a-lotting. he wrote back immediately “yeah i got it. sorry, i’m busy with school now. i’ll email you soon.” perfect. how heavenly. but then nothing for awhile. and then he found me on facebook.com and asked me to be his friend. and i immediately responded yes and then wrote something flirty(?) on his wall. and then, he removed me from his friend list…and i haven’t heard from him since… (p.s. i think my pictures look normal, but i might be wrong)
so here’s my question. what the hell am i to do? it occurred to me that i’m probably seeming way too excited to talk to him given my immediate responses and should play harder to get, but he’s cute and i WAS excited to talk to him and it was only like 2 sentences at a time so i feel like that doesn’t even count. plus, how do you play hard to get over the internet? but now he hates me. and i can’t write him again and tell him not to hate me because then that’s just sad. so what is normal online flirting protocol? what should i do next? i’m probably supposed to marry him but because i’m not wired to online flirt, my destiny is kissing me goodbye (only without the kiss, which is too bad…unless he’s a bad kisser…how am i even to know?)